Dave: ok, and when you twitter stuff like that, I’m sorely tempted to bring you food
Dave: are you seriously eating mustard?
Lisa: I am sampling some, yes
Lisa: ITS REALLY GOOD OK
Dave: Lisa…
Lisa: one of my coworkers got it special just for me
Lisa: I’m just licking some off of a chopstick
Dave: got it special just for your sandwiches
Lisa: and for my chopsticks!
Dave: go get food…please?
Lisa: I’m not hungry
Lisa: and I need to finish up these documents
Lisa: I’m just bored
Lisa: and the adrenaline high from the horseradish is exciting
Lisa: I didn’t get into work until 10
Lisa: and I took a two hour lunch
Lisa: so it’s not like I’m tired or anything
Dave: alright
Lisa: do you need me to come up with any other excuses?
* Lisa holds her anus open
Lisa: because I’m prepared
Dave: ok that was uncalled for
Dave: you just send twitters that make you sound so endearingly pathetic
Dave: you evoke every protective instinct in spite of myself
Dave: I don’t need to be rewarded for that with goatse
Lisa: endearingly pathetic, huh?
* Lisa snorts
Dave: what do you expect when you say you’re having mustard for dinner?
Lisa: …
Lisa: ITS GOOD MUSTARD

About the author: Lisa Brewster is a project manager and startup advisor in San Diego, CA. Subscribe to this blog by RSS or email, or follow me on Twitter for more updates.